Building strong, trusting relationships with your child is essential to protect them from potentially dangerous situations such as human trafficking. When kids feel safe, valued, and heard at home, they are less likely to seek relationships from those who may have harmful intentions. Regular, open conversations, and being actively involved in your child’s life can create a bond that helps children recognize unhealthy behavior and to feel comfortable coming to you with concerns. By being present, listening without judgement, and teaching them about healthy boundaries, you can help keep your child safe. Below are some tips to help:

1. Recognize the importance of relationships

One of the most important relationships your child will ever have is the one they have with you. Create a relationship where your child feels safe coming to you about anything. Get involved in your child’s life, learn about what they enjoy, for example, their favorite music, apps, and shows. Be intentional with your conversations. The best way to build trust and communication with your child is to get involved in their life and talk with them.

Be curious about your child’s friends, boyfriends, or girlfriends. Invite your child’s friends to your house so you get to know them better. Avoid making it awkward by interrogating them but show a genuine interest in who they are as people. Pay attention to changes in your child's friend groups. If your child suddenly stops talking about their normal group of friends or starts hanging out with a new group, it could be an indication that something is going on in your child’s life.

2. Words matter

Children pay close attention to not only the words you choose, but how you say those words. Have you noticed how your child sometimes thinks you are angry with them when you ask them a simple question? They notice the tone you use, your voice level, and your facial expressions. They will shut down if they feel they are being attacked, or aren't being heard.

Having regular conversations with your child is important for a trusting relationship. It allows your child to become comfortable talking with you about uncomfortable things. By bringing up these topics on a regular basis and not immediately reacting (or overreacting) to what your child says, it assures them that you can handle whatever it is they tell you. Be careful with how you react when you have these conversations, especially when your child talks with you about something they have done, are doing, or have witnessed, so they continue to come to you in the future. Be mindful in how you talk about your child’s friends, boyfriends, or girlfriends. If you talk negatively about their friends without spending time with those friends and getting to know them, your child will likely stop telling you about them.

Encourage your child, through your words and your actions, to come to you even if they have done something they know they shouldn’t do. Reassure them that you are a team, you are on their side, they can tell you anything, and you will help them to get through whatever they are going through. Talk about the steps to take if they experience something that doesn’t feel right, including if they get messages from strangers, someone sends them something inappropriate, or they are feeling uncomfortable in a relationship.

3. Be knowledgeable about technology and online safety

Talk with your child about the importance of not befriending people on social media they don’t know in real life. As a reminder, people we know in real life can also be predators. Unfortunately, child predators do not announce that they are predators. Although most parents will never be able to keep up to date on all social media and technology, it does not mean you cannot stay educated on the dangers and safeguards to best protect your child. Pay attention to slang language and popular social media apps and understand that things change quickly. There can be hidden meanings in emojis and abbreviations to convey information; for example, PIR means parent in room. The good news is that there are resources to help parents. You can utilize the resources listed at the end of this section and the end of this toolkit.

Trust, but verify. To maintain trust with your child, let them know that they should expect that you will randomly look through their phone, including their text messages, search history, and social media. Your child may have hidden applications or secret social media accounts to try to keep part of their life hidden from you. Ensure that you always know the passwords to their phone, email, and other accounts. Make it a rule that if you randomly check their phone and they have changed their password, their phone will be taken away. Remind them that it is because you love them that you do this.

Create rules about where phones are used in the house. Phones should only be used in common areas. Take away the temptation. When young people are in private areas, they may take more risks than they typically would. It is too tempting to look at things they shouldn’t, or to take inappropriate pictures when in private locations like the bathroom or their rooms overnight. Online predators often reach out to young people more in the evening or the middle of the night when they know they are alone in their rooms.

4. Know the signs

In addition to knowing what makes someone vulnerable to human trafficking (Section 2), grooming and recruitment methods (Section 3), and the red flags or signs of human trafficking (Section 4), there are other signs and behaviors to pay attention to. Although it comes from a good place, parents can sometimes be guilty of believing their child would never do something. For example, “My child would never share nude photos of themselves.” If a parent believes their child “would never,” they may miss the signs their child is doing or has done something. If a parent believes their child is not vulnerable to trafficking or exploitation, they may miss the signs that they are being trafficked or exploited.

Human Trafficking Awareness Parent Guide